Pete_LeGrant February 9, 2010 Entertainment 53 views Comments Print This Post  Email This Post

Cleveland, OH.  Adult video gamer, Jim Fredrickson, 33, is getting a life, thanks to the online prodding of teen gamer, UB3RNOOb_PwN3r.

Fredrickson had lightly teased UB3RNOOb_PwN3r in the multiplayer lobby about having stuck him with a semtex grenade during a round of Modern Warfare 2. UB3RNOOb_PwN3r, 15 years old, could tell Frederickson was an older gamer due to the deep pitch of his voice. UB3RNOOb_PwN3r was cranky for having gotten a referral in Social Studies class and was in no mood “to hear any lip” from an inexperienced adult.

UB3RNOOb_PwN3r immediately launched into his oft-rehearsed motivational speech, geared towards dispensing wisdom to older gamers. With great enthusiasm and flawless delivery, UB3RNOOb_PwN3r suggested that Frederickson:

• move out of his mom’s basement
• go to college
• get a job
• get his first girlfriend
• and have sex for the first time

Frederickson immediately had a “deep epiphany” and resolved to fulfill all of the UB3RNOOb_PwN3r’s “life-altering” tips, which Frederickson subsequently reported at family dinner. Fredrickson’s wife, Linda, responded: “Sure. Whatever. Just remember to pick up Janey from dance lessons.”